By James Ouma
/ April 10, 2018 April 10, 2018 / 4 minutes of reading
According to a research by The Telegraph, spending quality time with your teen is vital. It has a greater impact on their well-being. The adolescence period is filled with hormonal turbulence that needs your active involvement.
Teens who spend quality time with their parents do not engage in social vices. That is why meal times, picnics, camping or a family road trip is essential for your teen’s wholesome growth.
Where do you I find time and the energy when I have given my career my all, you may wonder. It is indeed laudable that you are working hard to provide for your family’s basic needs. However, quality time is essential not only for teens but your whole family.
Granted, modern technology has transformed the way we engage with each other. We no longer need to be in the same room to stay connected. But, social media forums cannot replace face-to-face interactions with your loved ones.
Much as we lead busy lives, spending quality time with your teen is possible. This being so, it important to spend quality time with your child without shirking your responsibility. Additionally, it is important to know how well this time will impact your child’s future.
“If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them and half as much money.”
– Abigail Van Buren
Spend quality time now and thank me later
Between the ages of 13-14 years, your teenage daughter needs your attention and time. On the other hand, boys feel most insecure between the ages of 16-17 years. At this stage, your teen has been exposed to environments that can be damaging and negative. If not managed well, it can derail their future. Your teen depends on you to show them the way forward.
In the above study, a parent took what is called a “teen maternity leave” for 8 years. She did this in order to help her teens manage their transition into adulthood. By doing this, she ensured she was actively involved in bringing up her teens instead of shirking her responsibility.
Kenya showcases worrying parenting trends where most parents shirk their responsibilities as parents. Most believe taking care of their children’s comforts and needs is enough.
Some believe that it is the duty of teachers, nannies and caregivers to take care of their children. Your direct involvement has great impact in your child’s lives. It also influences their adult lives and parenting too.
Examples of how can spend quality time with your teenage daughter or son
Doing various weekend tasks
There are some tasks that you can manage with your teens while at home and spend quality time with them. Most of these tasks are ideal for the weekend. Examples of tasks include the following:-
mending a fence
mowing the lawn
creating a kitchen garden
Taking a walk with your teen enables them to open up to you. This enables you to know what is going on in their lives. You are not always with them daily; so, this is an opportune time to do so. Besides talking, the walk will be beneficial to your health too.
You should not hold back on your teenage son or daughter. They are looking forward to being adults and are a bit confused on how to go about this. This being so, you need to share with them what to expect in adulthood and the challenges that come with this.
Remember, you do not have to make it complicated. The task may be simple. But your teem will always remember what you taught them while doing a particular project? In the end, you will have a responsible adult based on the quality time you spend with them.
“No amount of money or success can take the place of time spent with your family.”
Finally, providing for your family’s comfort, safety and basic needs is very important. Your career may enable you to provide for your teen’s needs, take them to the best school and afford the best nanny. However, this should not be mistaken for responsible parenting. Your teen needs your time and your physical presence, not your presents.
Quality time will enable you to connect with your teen. It is something you should do with consistency. It should not be a one-off activity conducted during school holidays.
“If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.”
– Mother Teresa
It’s your turn now…
What are some of activities, quotes or family traditions that enable you to spend quality time with your family or spouse? Please share your thoughts, insights and comments below. If you haven’t done already, sign up to receive new articles delivered to your inbox.
James Ouma is a CTI Clarity Coach, Cyclist and Writer. He is passionate about breaking boys out of prison through restorative justice and clarity coaching. He loves staring at his bicycle and hoping it'll count as a cycling exercise, flipping to the end of movies and insisting he has watched it, and playing ‘tap out’ with his wife.